Have you seen all those photos on Facebook with captions so full of positivity and love and ‘awesomeness’? Or perhaps you’ve seen a video from a self-development guru telling you that if you think it, it will come true.
Comfort is a great start
I agree that these positive thoughts and ideas can help in some way. You’re not alone, someone else is out there feeling a little down too. We’re all human, even when we’re worlds apart.
These photos, videos, and books on how to be awesome can provide some comfort to you. But how do you feel when you log off Facebook and go you back into the real world? How do you feel a few hours or days after you’ve been to a seminar on ‘being awesome’ or watched some kind of motivational speech on YouTube?
Bubbles burst but planes fly high
Some of the self-development advice, mantra, and slogans are but a bubble. What they say makes you feel good while you’re ‘inside the bubble’, but at some point it bursts.
How do you feel when you were promised ‘awesome’ and then you fall to ground? You probably feel worse than before.
So what should we all do?
As I said, these positive messages can be comforting and offer encouragement for you to DO SOMETHING.
So that’s what you have to do -> take action.
These messages from your Facebook friends or pages of ‘gurus’ you like are all about getting you off the sofa at home and taking action to make your life better. But at the same time, it’s important to feel comfortable with who you are.
Steps to real English confidence
If you want to be confident in English, then there are a few things which you can do to move forward:
Integrate English into your lifestyle
This means you’re meeting people and speaking in English with them. This doesn’t mean that you should try to get ‘English practice’, but rather develop genuine friendships with people who you’d like to get to know. Get real! Discover more about the world and yourself by finding out more about the people you meet.
Other steps you can take include reading books and magazines which you enjoy. If you don’t have the money then download free apps where you can create your very own English webzine: Zite and Flipboard are good examples!
Do you keep a diary or journal in English? Do you email friends regularly? What about studying at home when it’s raining outside and you feel like a having lazy Sunday?
Play your favourite songs and try to work out what they’re about.
Some people choose to have a teacher, which can help a lot. Your English teacher can help you on language matters and also provide some feedback on how you can speak more naturally and confidently.
The combination between working on your English either through study or with a teacher and getting out there and living English will help you a lot.
Put ‘awesome’ away for now
The American bloggers and self-development authors who are telling you how to be ‘awesome’ didn’t get there overnight.
It took them time.
And to be fair, we don’t even know if they’re really feeling wonderful inside or if it’s just a marketer selling another product.
Now they’re rocking back on their chair by the pool, with a beautiful wife beside them, telling you that this can be your life too. And all you need to do is pay for their book or DVD series.
But let’s bring this all back to you. What do you want to do with learning English?
Are you learning English to travel and make friends in exciting, exotic countries? Is it for work? Or simply because you like the cultures of the countries where English is spoken?
Here’s two ideas on ‘awesomeness’ to take away for today:
1. What does ‘awesome’ mean for you personally? What does it look like? Is it something which seems too great to achieve?
2. Why not forget ‘awesome’ and just start somewhere, anywhere today? Or why not change your definition of ‘awesome’ to mean something that you know you can do today?
Because ultimately you don’t get fully confident in doing something before you actually do it.
The confidence and those great feelings you have come after you have done it. Perhaps the first time, perhaps after you’ve done it several times.
Yes, you can do it, and you can be confident in English – but whether or not you’re in the bubble, you still need to take the next step yourself.
Choose one step you can take today, and keep going!
By the time you are where you want to be, you probably won’t even care about this idea of being ‘awesome’ because you’ll be doing exactly what you want, for you, not anyone else.
And to be honest, is ‘awesome’ even a goal? What you might want to do is to learn English to travel around the world, but you can feel wonderful or pleased with yourself simply by taking that next step today.
Somewhere, anywhere. Be cool with where you are.
Good luck and enjoy the journey!
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